The Single Guy and the Chicken Alfredo

The following tale is based on actual events which occurred a number of years ago…

It’s not often that I date. I know, that’s an understatement. On those rare occasions that I do happen to ask someone out, I’m kind of proud of myself. This happened a few years ago when I asked out a woman I’d known in college.

She was never someone that I had known very well. We would hang out with the same people from time to time but, at best, we were just acquaintances. Of course, that had not stopped us from being Facebook friends for several years.

A few weeks prior to the date in question, I noticed something she had posted on the social network. This got me thinking about her a little. I had always thought of her as attractive and knew her to be a very sweet girl in college. So I checked her all important relationship status. She was single and didn’t live too far away.

With a little encouragement from Mark, I talked myself into sending her a message asking her to dinner. Due to busy and complicated work schedules, we exchanged messages for a couple weeks before settling on a good day and time to meet up.

She suggested meeting at the Olive Garden. This warmed my heart, because who doesn’t love the Olive Garden? We planned to meet at five. This seemed a bit early to me, considering I had no plan for activities after dinner. But then I thought it could be okay as we could easily stretch dinner out with conversation.

But, you have to remember, this is me we’re talking about. Conversation isn’t exactly my forte. Particularly when faced with an attractive single woman. They’re like my kryptonite. Like how Clark Kent would get all klutzy and stuttery when Lois Lane was around. Except that his kryptonite was actual kryptonite.

Point is, dinner only lasted about 90 minutes. I knew that couldn’t have been a good sign. At one point, I looked down at my cold chicken alfredo and silently berated myself for being so socially awkward.

I walked her to her car and hugged her, letting her know it was great seeing her. To me, the hug felt slightly forced, like we were both just trying to be polite.

The next day, I kicked myself for not asking for her number. So I emailed her again. I thanked her for a great time and asked for her number, suggesting that we get together again sometime.

After a week went by without a response, I figured it was for the best. After all, if conversation doesn’t flow easily over a 90 minute dinner at Olive Garden, there’s a good chance you won’t be able to lay the foundation for a decent relationship. Of course, it could just be that I’m awkward…Chandler - Hopeless Awkward Desperate

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