From Gregory Stock’s The Book of Questions: Do you think kids should be sheltered from unhappiness? What experiences from your own childhood have proved most valuable? What were the most difficult to overcome? Were they happy or unhappy experiences?

Note: I answer this question not as a parent, but as an outsider who has worked with children throughout my career…

As much as we’d like to wrap our children in bubble wrap and shield them from every negative experience, I believe that doing so is actually setting them up for failure in the long run. Life, as we all know, is full of ups and downs. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions, and if we don’t let our kids experience the full spectrum, how can we expect them to cope when they inevitably face challenges as adults?

Looking back on my own childhood, some of the most valuable lessons I learned came from the toughest experiences. Remember that time you didn’t make the baseball team? Or when your best friend moved away? Those moments stung like a bee, but they also taught us resilience, empathy, and the importance of perseverance.

Sure, it’s tempting to intervene every time our child faces a setback, but sometimes the best thing we can do is step back and let them navigate those choppy waters on their own. It’s like the old saying goes: “Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.” By allowing our kids to face and overcome challenges, we’re equipping them with the tools they need to thrive in the real world.

Now, I’m not suggesting we throw our kids to the wolves and let them fend for themselves. We can still be there to offer guidance, support, and a shoulder to cry on when needed. But we shouldn’t be afraid to let them experience the full range of human emotions, even the not-so-pleasant ones.

In my own life, some of the most difficult experiences to overcome were the ones that hit me out of left field. Like that time I lost my job and had to start from scratch. It was a gut-wrenching, pride-swallowing experience, but it also taught me the value of adaptability and the importance of having a strong support system.

So, what do you think? Should we be sheltering our kids from unhappiness, or is a little adversity a good thing? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. And if you disagree with me, that’s okay too – just promise not to egg my car, alright?