There are no presents under my Christmas tree. There are none that I’ve bought and wrapped that are waiting to be delivered. There are none that have been given to me to be opened on Christmas morning. Not a thing. Not even a stocking stuffer.

That’s because Mom said we’re not doing presents this year. And we’re really sticking to that, right? (Looking at you, Mom… and April…) See, we’ve had Christmases like this in the past. “Oh, we won’t do presents this year… budget’s just too tight…” And for me that’s no big deal. But then December 25 rolls around and guess who has presents coming his way! And guess who doesn’t have any presents to hand out!

And why wouldn’t I have any presents to hand out? Because I took my family at their word that we’re “not doing presents” this year.

When it comes to love languages, gifts is not one of mine. It’s not a way I like to show affection and it’s not a way I like to receive affection. To me, gifts are an obligation. If you get something for me and I don’t have something for you in return, I’m gonna feel bad. I’m sure there’s some deep psychological root to that way of thinking and that particular guilt trip, but that’s something I can explore with my therapist in the new year.

Once again, I am believing my mother when she says we’re not doing presents this year. So I haven’t bought a single thing for her, my step-father, nor for my sister. Therefore… nothing under the tree.

Sure, gifts isn’t a love language that I speak fluently, but I’d be lying if I didn’t enjoy opening a present from time to time. It’s nice to get a surprise. It’s nice to be able to say, “You shouldn’t have…” as you excitedly open a box with something you could genuinely use or something you’ve actually wanted but just haven’t taken the time to go out and buy for yourself. Sure, it can be awkward to grumble a quick, “You really shouldn’t have…” when you get that annual tin full of three types of stale popcorn.

That said, I wouldn’t complain if I woke up on Christmas morning to find that Santa had left a handful of goodies under my tree or inside my stocking… And here’s a short list, should he happen to be reading this post…

• PlayStation 5
• A new car in excellent working condition, minus the car payment
• Student loan debt relief
• A 6-pack of IBC Cherry-Limeaid, glass bottles
• A top of the line desktop computer
• A kitten
• Or a puppy
• Lifelong financial stability

That’s all I’ve got. Don’t want to seem too greedy.