Rewatching Buffy – Episode 61

buffy-titleWelcome to Rewatching Buffy, the part of the blog where I rewatch Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Each Tuesday evening, you’re invited to join me as I attempt to rediscover what made me love this show 21 years ago.

Beer Bad

  • Like many episodes, we open in a graveyard. Buffy’s fighting a vampire.
  • Wait… what’s Parker doing there?
  • Gotta be a dream.
  • Buffy manages to stake three vamps and saves Parker’s life.
  • And he’s super apologetic about the way he treated her.
  • Reality: Buffy’s in class. She’s daydreaming. While Parker sits a few rows away, flirting with a girl.
  • Meanwhile, Professor Walsh teaches the class about the id, ego, and superego. That’s probably going to be important to this very special episode of Buffy.
  • Oh, and I’m not going to count those slayings on the body count. Because they’re dream slayings.
  • P.S. – Buffy… get over this guy already!
  • Xander visits the girls on campus. He lets them know he’s gotten a job as a bartender.
  • Wait… Xander’s too young to be a bartender.
  • Okay… I’m tired of Buffy rambling about Parker. This is pathetic.
  • Buffy ends up visiting the pub where Xander is working. Parker’s there.
  • But so is Riley. He tries to give Buffy advice about guys like Parker, but she’s too busy staring at Parker. Ugh.
  • As Xander serves a girl, a guy who fills the role of Ponytail from Good Will Hunting comes along to make Xander look stupid.
  • He then gives Xander a speech about how, because he’s smarter and in college, he’s the future of this country, not guys like Xander.
  • Good luck with that, college guy. Speaking as someone who was a sophomore in college when this episode originally aired, you’re looking at mountains of student loan debt and a bachelor’s degree that probably won’t be worth the paper it’s printed on when it’s all said and done.
  • I mean… yay, college!
  • Xander tries to demand the guy’s ID for his pitcher of Black Frost. But the head bartender just tells Xander to give it to him.
  • Buffy talks to Xander, seems to finally come to the understand that Parker’s problem with intimacy is that he can’t get enough of it.
  • As she goes to leave, Buffy runs into Ponytail’s friend, spilling his beer. They invite her to drink with them.
  • Ugh… underage drinking. This will lead to all kinds of no good.
  • Willow and Oz are hanging out at the Bronze. A nice, normal place to hang out.
  • Oz is distracted. By the girl singing with the band.
  • It’s the same girl that turned Oz’s head back in Living Conditions. Her name is Veruca.
  • Back at the bar, Buffy and the douchey beer guzzlers are still guzzling beer. At least she calls them out on how they really like to hear themselves talk.
  • The next morning, Buffy seems super hungover. And monosyllabic.
  • In psych class, Buffy snatches a girl’s sandwich out of her hands and starts eating it.
  • Something’s up. A mad scientist’s chemistry set pouring something into a keg of Black Frost tells me that the beer isn’t just beer.
  • Buffy and the guys are all back at the bar. Drinking more beer. They’re becoming less evolved with each sip.
  • Trouble is brewing with Oz and Willow. Oz wants to go check out Veruca’s band again. Willow’s not so much into that idea. We’re being set up for heartbreak.
  • At the bar, Xander cuts Buffy off. He just assumes she’s had one too many, telling her to go home and sleep it off.
  • The other guys just keep on drinking.
  • Willow goes to visit Parker at some secluded coffee shop. She confronts him. And he doesn’t think he did anything wrong.
  • Xander gets the drunk guys to settle up. And they’re basically turning into cavemen.
  • They attack Xander and he scares them off with his lighter. Fire bad.
  • Xander’s boss doesn’t seem shocked. “They had it comin’.”
  • Guess we know who our mad scientist is.
  • He brags about how his brother-in-law is a warlock who showed him what to do. Then he says it’ll wear off in a day or so.
  • One of the cavemen gets hit by a car. He’s hurt, but it doesn’t kill him.
  • The other three attack the car. Then they chase after a couple of pretty girls. Probably going to bonk them over the head and drag them back to their cave.
  • Xander gets Giles (who rightly admonishes Xander for serving the underage Buffy beer at all) and they find Buffy in her room.
  • She’s cave painting the wall. And hitting the figure she painted with her open palm. “Parker bad!”
  • Little Miss One Track Mind.
  • Parker is still talking to Willow… trying to subtly seduce her. She sees through it, and compares him to a caveman.
  • And then the cavemen show up.
  • They start a fire in the coffee shop. But, being cavemen, they don’t know how to control it. And it quickly gets out of control.
  • Willow’s lying unconscious on the floor. So this is gonna turn out well for everyone.
  • Buffy gets away from Giles and Xander. Her quest for more beer has taken over.
  • Buffy smells the smoke from the fire and heads toward it. Even though fire bad.
  • Always the hero.
  • She grabs the fire extinguisher. And throws it into the flames. Yeah, that’s not how that works.
  • She sees Willow on the other side of the fire. She manages to save her. And she even goes back for Parker and saves him… after knocking him out with a big stick.
  • Everyone gets out alive.
  • In the aftermath, Parker finds Buffy and tries to apologize for how he treated her.
  • So she knocks him out again.
  • Body count: Everyone lives!
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