Ridiculous Conversations at the Bank

In the world of banking, the people on the front lines of the industry are known as tellers. These are the people who are expected to help customers with all of their day to day banking needs. It is often a thankless and miserable position to hold. These are their stories. These are their legends…

Also… Disclaimer: As these bank teller legends progress chronologically, you’ll probably notice that I steadily become angrier. My sarcasm, at times, knew no bounds. Please be aware that I am no longer the same man I was at that time. Yes, still sarcastic. But it’s just not purposefully hurtful like it once was.

Bank Teller 4I have no doubt that I’ve mentioned the ridiculous conversations that some customers felt they needed to have whenever they came into the bank. And it’s because it seemed such an obvious problem in America.

See, there are a lot of people out there who have this incredible urge to fill a silent moment with mindless chatter about any little thing that could possibly enter their brain. But, most of those people have a really hard time coming up with something interesting to say.

As a bank teller, I had plenty of interesting things to say. Not all of them would have been polite or even deemed appropriate for social situations. But I was also not one of those people that felt that silence between two complete strangers is a terrible thing.

For the ones that have to talk and can’t come up with anything original, it’s a really good thing that the weather changes every so often. If it clouds up one day and looks as if it may rain, well, that gives a lot of people a great conversation starter. If it’s clear and cool, well, those same people feel the need to point that out, too.

In the summer, in Raleigh, it was hot. For long stretches of several days (that felt like several weeks) the weather persisted with the heat and the humidity. And roughly a hundred people, on each of those days, felt that it was their place to let us, the bank employees, know just how hot it was outside. And what was great was that many of those people made the bank run on a daily basis. So they would tell us the next day just how hot it was then, too.

Now, that logical and reserved part of me knows that, even though I hated my job, it wouldn’t have been good to get fired for being sarcastic with one of my customers. But I so badly wanted to pull out the sarcasm when someone told me it was hot outside.

“What? It’s hot outside?! Hey! Everybody! Captain Obvious, here, wants us all to know that it’s hot outside! We should all thank him for his meteorological insights.” Then I’d start clapping. Then my face would turn into one of utter revulsion. Then I’d call him a moron.

But I was pretty sure that kind of thing could have gotten me fired. Didn’t want to do that. If I was gonna get fired from that job, it wasn’t going to be because I mouthed off to some random person that I was probably never gonna see again.


4 thoughts on “Ridiculous Conversations at the Bank

  1. Oddly enough, I’ve had bank tellers, etc., ask me, the customer who just came from outdoors, what the weather was like. Maybe they’d spent too much time inside. Maybe they wanted to preempt the weather conversation. Maybe they had a bet going on how many people said the exact same thing. I dunno. If it was the last scenario though, I hope I made them lose a bet or two, ’cause I’m spiteful like that.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Having to be polite to the general public day after day is a very hard job! (I tried it a few times 😉 ). Oh how I would love to run my own bar and restaurant, call it ‘Mir Tells it Like it is’ and then give any awful patrons my true opinions :). Mir xx

    Liked by 1 person

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